My mother can be a fun and funny person, who likes to laugh and make crafty things and read stories and do puzzles. Sometimes, though, she gets a bit blue … her lost memory loss, her arthritic knee, her absent friends, and so on. I understand that she is dealing with a lot of loss, but it is frustrating when she cannot shift her mindset. Her doctor tried to convince her that she could look at this as a time to relax and to be thankful for what she has. I’ve also tried to convince her of that, as have others. But to no avail – I live in hope that she gets distracted by something entertaining that takes her mind off her problems.
My challenge is that, while I try to stay upbeat, I’m still nursing some frustration at the changes in my life. Mom’s discontent is contagious and I soon find myself annoyed with my own losses. This feeling is made worse since I know that I have been very fortunate to have such good and accommodating colleagues and friends who have been fantastic through the past couple of years. So, essentially, I become annoyed with Mom, frustrated with the situation, impatient for change and ungrateful to those who have been generous to me – yikes!
Now, truth be told, these bluer moods don’t hit all the time – just once in a while. Most of the time, we are quite nice people. We enjoy life and being able to spend these years together and, of course, having Oscar in our little family. So, to stave off those sad days, we are going to try something new: writing down things for which we are grateful and things we would like to change. It may not be everyday, but hopefully it will help us both settle into something more positive and remind us that we really are lucky.